Cruise ships aren’t just holidays to me they’re a second home. I spend countless hours walking the decks, chatting with crew members, and truly getting to know the inner workings of these floating cities.
And, because I’m a busy body and always asking questions, I’ve uncovered a few cheeky secrets you’ll only uncover if you know who to ask. Behind the scenes of these floating cities, there is a whole world that passengers rarely get to see.
As someone who has cruised nearly 60 times, I’ve picked up a few cheeky secrets. Some are practical, some are shocking and some sound straight out of a reality TV show.
Here are five cruise secrets they don’t advertise in the brochure
Yes, There is a Morgue Onboard
I know, you don’t want to think about death when you’re on holidays, but it’s true. Every cruise ship has a morgue. It’s not advertised (for obvious reasons), but it’s required by maritime law. These rooms are refrigerated and designed to respectfully hold bodies until the ship reaches port. Since ships carry thousands of passengers, medical emergencies happen. It’s unsettling, but a necessary part of operating a floating city.
Here’s the cheeky secret: morgues are often used to store flowers to keep them fresh. Obviously when they’re unoccupied.
There is a Reason Buffets Don’t Have Trays
Ever notice cruise ship buffets rarely offer trays? That is absolutely intentional, Without trays, passengers take less food, which reduces waste and keeps those long lines moving. It’s a quiet win for the food and beverage team to keep things running smoothly.
Leftover Food is Carefully Weighed
When I first started cruising, I am loathe to admit, I used to pile my plates high with food from the buffet. I am much more considerate now and don’t allow my eyes to dictate my stomach.
But, it always bothered me seeing the sheer amount of food waste. Where does all the waste go? As you can probably imagine, cruise lines obsess over waste. After every meal, leftover food is weighed and logged. This helps the food and beverage teams adjust portion sizes, plan menus and be efficient. Untouched food from prep areas might be repurposed for crew meals, but the stuff already served? That’s gone.
Food is disposed of in various ways, but did you know some of it actually goes overboard? Waste is macerated (ground up) and sent into the sea to feed all the little fishies. This has to be done more than 12 nautical miles from shore and the little particles have to be less than 25mm
Crew Relationships Are Very Real
Crew members work incredibly long hours, live together, and spend months away from home. Romance happens a lot! (If the boat is a’rocking, don’t come a’knocking). I have met so many crew who have married other crew. Sigh, how romantic.
But the juicy secret is that many, many crew have ‘ship wives/husbands’ and ‘land wives/husbands.
The biggest no-no and fireable offence is absolutely no fraternising with guests. Hands off friends, no matter how cute the bartender.
Most Areas Are Under Constant Surveillance
Think you’re alone on a quiet deck at 3:00am? Think again. Cruise ships are covered in cameras. Hallways, decks, stairwells, and public areas are monitored 24/7. This isn’t just for crime, but helps track missing passengers, manage emergencies and settle disputes. If something happens, footage is often the first thing investigators review. Oh, and yes, there is a ship jail. Unruly behaviour means you can get locked up in the brig or put under cabin-arrest.
So, the next time you’re sipping a cocktail on deck, remember you’re floating on a finely-tuned city filled with romance, and surprises. There are secrets, but, as they say, what happens on a ship, stays on the ship.
